November 17, 2010

  • Miracle of miracles....

    I am on the computer and it is the middle of the day.

    Lately I have had so much going on and going through my head, when I sit down to write it comes out all jumbled up.

    It comes out al mish mash and I can't even make sense of it. So here I will try.

    • still looking for a job
    • looking at cars so I can get to said job
    • getting ready for christmas as I have no extra money to spend.
    • spend time wishing that I could talk on the phone to a few of my friends especially R.
    • talked to an aunt that wishes I had inherited my grandmother's house. The ones that got it gutted it and ruined it so no one wants to visit.
    • found out that a cousin of mine was within a few miles of me for over 10 days and didn't contact me. Made me very sad that they didn't want to spend any time with me.
    • really angry at E for beind such an arse to B.
    • really angry at myself for not doing a better job with the kids so they wouldn't have to be with E and him being such an arse.
    • sad for the kids because E was really nice till we moved into this house then he changed for the worse.
    • trying not to wish someone could come and rescue me....I need to do it myself.
    • tired all around with what is going on with my kids.
    • wish I could rant and rave and scream and cry and get all this angst out so I can be lighthearted again for a while.
    • wish I could talk to a friend that I laugh with so that I could feel lighthearted again. I miss that. But then untill I get all this worked through and out I don't know if I would be any good at conversing.